A few weekends ago my oldest daughter Hannah and I were out weeding our blueberries. Out of the blue she makes a pretty cool observation about weeds and friends:
“Weeds are like friends. Some have shallow roots and die off easy and some have one strong root that go deep.”
We then went on to chat about all the different analogies we could make. It was a good day working alongside my daughter who is off to the University of Richmond today.
The shocking and funny truth is that weeds are like friends.
Being an on again off again gardener I have a hate-hate relationship with weeds. But after my daughters statement I will always look at them in a different light.
- Some friends have shallow roots and it is best to let them die off.
We all have them, or have been one of them depending on the situation. You make a fast friend and all seems great, but then you realize, “Oops, what I have gotten myself into?” You notice most of your conversations are around them, and they never seek to discover new things about you but are always letting you know all the details of their life. I say quickly pull them up and move on. Life is too short to waste on the takers.
- Some friends have many seeds that spread and take over.
You know them well. They are invasive and spread like wildfire. They move in, take over all your relationships, and turn the focus towards them. They have a need to be the center of attention and their entire image is based on how many friends they have. Run fast and get the weed killer.
- Some friends have one deep root and can be a source for life for you.
Most of us have that one person we go to for a particular issue in our life. Or at least I do. They seem to have a good grasp on one thing that you need help with or support on. They have a deep root with much experience. You may not always spend time with them or they may be part of your life for a time, but they are an important part at the right time. They do not make you feel bad when the time is up, and they are comfortable with it. They understand the relationship and are not trying to spread into other areas of your life.
- Some friends have deep and wide roots and will be there with you for the long run.
If we are lucky, we have one or two friends who are always there for you and you for them. The relationship is both deep and wide. It seems almost effortless to grow and maintain. You can go long times of drought and get back together and it was like you never missed a beat. There is no guilt, no one up conversations. The concern is for the other and the focus is on how we can support each other. It is not a concern of “How is this going to benefit me?” but the concern is “How I can be a benefit?”
There you have it. Which kind of weed are you to your friends?